


everyone's holding their breath

by endquestionmark



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Book Thief - Markus Zusak
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Drabble, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-06
Updated: 2013-11-06
Packaged: 2017-12-31 15:51:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1033513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/endquestionmark/pseuds/endquestionmark
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The word for James Buchanan Barnes was not <i>vivacious</i> — full of life, and admittedly true, but still. The word for him was <i>voracious</i>. Of course, what’s a letter or three between friends?</p>
            </blockquote>





	everyone's holding their breath

**Author's Note:**

> Narrated, of course, by Death. 
> 
> Warnings for mentions of torture, violence, and major canon-compliant character death (though temporary).

The word for James Buchanan Barnes was not _vivacious_ — full of life, and admittedly true, but still. The word for him was _voracious_. Of course, what’s a letter or three between friends?

++

When Bucky fell, he died. His breath crystallized in the air, a ribbon of ice crystals following him down; his heart stuttered and stilled, a fluttering sunset-flame. He died, and I took his soul, and he came burning with fury, almost too incandescent to hold, and he gave me gifts of memory —

— the orphanage, when he and Steve were children of bird-bones held together by broth and prayer — 

— one back alley after another. There were women in this time. There were also men in this time. There were kisses, exchanged as fiercely as Bucky ever did anything. There were fights, and I watched his cupid's-bow mouth, the string drawn, become a snarl —

— a dark room, and needles. He didn't linger there. Neither did I, if we're being honest. I always prize a clean job above all else, and this was anything but —

— and through it all, that snarl of a smile, teeth bared, and whether it was in joy or fear or rage, that elation. James Buchanan Barnes -- or Bucky, because what's in a name is who you make yourself to be — was ravenous, you see, ravenous to be and give and do. That’s what life is, they say; life is hunger. Life is starvation and the knowledge that one can never be fully sated.

++

Bucky Barnes, snarling in life and death, dead-eyed in life and with eyes of flame in death, burned in my arms like a signal fire, like all the souls I carry until such time as they wink out, gone elsewhere or nowhere or neither at all. Bucky Barnes was stolen like fire by Prometheus, taken from the gods, except that I am not a god, and I bear no grudges. If one can be reborn, one may find Elysium on Earth; that’s my reasoning.

After all, Bucky Barnes never wanted to die. For all his hunger, for the intensity of his starvation, he never wanted to be sated; he wanted to be voracious forever, eternally chasing the next firefly-spark of satisfaction.

After all, when Bucky Barnes fell, as when he was born, he was screaming.


End file.
